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MEH - The Mad Ramblings of Nchanter [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Nchanter

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MEH [Aug. 4th, 2005|11:49 am]
Nchanter
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So I called the customer support line (and was on hold for a half hour. seriously) for my MailIX service and the guy said he wouldn't blame me if I changed providers. This is rediculous. Yes, hotmail has black listed their servers. They provide service to too many spammers.

Really, what I should do is trust Darxus. It's free, I'll have instant tech support, and I can use sex as a tactic in getting things accomplished. Plus I can be *assured* that spammers aren't useing the same servers as I am. I'm scared to give him that much power, not that I think he'll abuse it. And I am hopeing to spend the rest of my life with him, one of these days I should start believing that it will happen, and if it doesn't, that he's a big enough man not to screw me over.

These things suck.

I can't believe I'm asking my friends page if I should trust my boyfriend. I trust that he doesn't lie to me. I trust that he follows our safe-sex guidelines, and I trust that he won't leave me for another woman. Why can't I trust that he won't cut off my e-mail? ('cause I've had an ex-boyfriend delete my shell account on our school server. He got a slap on the wrist. I became nchanter@csw for a few years)

-Kris
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: beowabbit
2005-08-04 04:05 pm (UTC)
Well, I provide mail hosting services to a handful of people, none of whom I've had any sort of falling out with (although I do do other tech stuff with/for somebody I've had a falling out with), but some of whom I've more or less lost touch with (following moves out of state). I can't imagine doing bad things with their mail. I can't imagine reading it without their explicit permission. Actually, in one case I have explicit blanket permission, but I still ask each time if there's some reason to look at her mail (for diagnosing problems, or looking up an address for her).

In my courtroom, deleting one of your users' accounts for personal reasons is a hangin' offense.
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[User Picture]From: ert
2005-08-04 04:30 pm (UTC)
The general question you're asking is how much you should ultimately integrate your own life with your partner's, and how quickly you should get there. It's a personal balancing act.

My parents are almost indistinguishable. My mother reads my father's email and it makes it difficult to arrange surprises for her. I registered dietrich's domain, and a year after breaking up it's still in my name despite attempts to transfer. But I've also seen people keep separate apartments when they spend pretty much every night at their boyfriend's place, and really you're just paying double rent.

Both choices are probably fine at this point. Trust your gut.
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[User Picture]From: drwex
2005-08-04 06:25 pm (UTC)
NOTE - this entry is not currently friends-locked. Your comment
I can't believe I'm asking my friends page...
leads me to wonder if you intended to lock it. I note that you've got anon and openid comments turned off so only friends can respond.

Second, beo has been hosting a couple of mailing lists for me for several years and is a capable, kind, and responsive sysadmin. I'd suggest considering his offer.

Finally, I think ert's comment is very wise. It's not a black and white situation, it's a matter of how two people integrate their lives and at what pace. In my own case, even after ten years and two kids together Pygment doesn't have all my passwords, nor I all of hers. Which is kind of silly since we do have each others' passwords to the financial stuff, but there you go.
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[User Picture]From: nchanter
2005-08-04 07:27 pm (UTC)
Nope, didn't intend to lock it. I also don't have it set up so only friends can comment, I have it set up so only logged-in livejournal users can comment. [Unknown LJ tag] is *not* actually on my friends list, but I don't mind that he reads my journal. Those comment settings are actually in place from old drama from whence I was in highschool, and the openID being turned off is 'cause it's the default setting when they implamented openID, and none of my friends have asked me to change it.

As for considereing his offer, I am considering his and a number of other people's offers (n_tropy is the only other one off the top of my head, but i think there were others) but I know that haveing Darxus do it would really be the most convinient for me. Living with my mail provider has *got* to have some sort of advantages.

as for the last part, well, yea, I'm thinking it's what I should do, and will probably end up doing. Still scary. And he's been re-assuring me some today, which is good.
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[User Picture]From: moonshadow
2005-08-04 07:49 pm (UTC)
You can trust him.
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