Nchanter (nchanter) wrote,
Nchanter
nchanter

  • Mood:
  • Music:

courtesy of my dad via e-mail...

1. HOW DO YOU GET HOLY WATER? You boil the hell out of it.

2. WHAT DO FISH SAY WHEN THEY HIT A CONCRETE WALL? Dam.

3. WHAT DO ESKIMOS GET FROM SITTING ON THE ICE? Polaroids.

4. WHAT DO YOU CALL CHEESE THAT ISN'T YOURS? Nacho cheese.

5. WHAT DO YOU CALL A BOOMERANG THAT DOESN'T WORK? A stick.

6. WHAT DO YOU CALL SANTA'S HELPERS? Subordinante clauses.

7. WHAT DO YOU CALL 4 BULLFIGHTERS IN QUICKSAND? Quatro sinko.

8. WHAT DO YOU GET FROM A PAMPERED COW? Spoiled milk.

9. WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A SNOWMAN WITH A VAMPIRE? Frostbite.

10. WHAT LIES AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN AND TWITCHES? A nervous wreck.

11. WHERE DO YOU FIND A DOG WITH NO LEGS? Right where you left him.

12. WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ROAST BEEF AND PEA SOUP? Anyone can
roast beef.

13. WHY DO GORILLAS HAVE BIG NOSTRILS? Because they have big fingers.

14. WHY DON'T BLIND PEOPLE LIKE TO SKYDIVE? Because it scares the dog.

15. WHAT KIND OF COFFEE WAS SERVED ON THE TITANIC? Sanka

16. WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A HARLEY AND A HOOVER? The location
of the dirt bag.

17. WHY DOES A PILGRIMS PANTS ALWAYS FALL DOWN? Because they wear their
buckles on their hats.

18. WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A BAD GOLFER AND A BAD SKYDIVER? A
bad golfer goes whack, damn. A bad skydiver goes, damn, whack.

19. HOW DO YOU CATCH A UNIQUE RABBIT? Unique up on it.

20. HOW DO YOU CATCH A TAME RABBIT? Tame way, unique up on it.

21. WHAT DO YOU CALL SKYDIVING LAWYERS? Skeet.

22. WHAT GOES CLOP, CLOP, CLOP, BANG, BANG, CLOP, CLOP, CLOP? An Amish
drive-by shooting.

23. HOW ARE A ARKANSAS TORNADO AND A TENNESEE DIVORCE THE SAME?
Somebody's gonna lose a trailer.
Subscribe
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

  • 8 comments