||[May. 16th, 2002|03:53 am]
i'm at dan aka kaos's. i don't know why i am awake. i will kick myself in the morning. aj thinks i should call in dead. i'm inclined to agree with him. i'm bad at this responsibility thing if i'm not enjoying myself. i'm not enjoying myself, and i don't think i can handle the hours right now. i don't know what to do.
i don't know why i like it over here. maybe 'cause i sit around and do nothing in the company of others. i don't feel pressured to be in cute little black outfits trying desperately to match my male best friend, and failing, and retain every car-talk that is mentioned and know about guns too. though this knowledge has come in useful. there is theatre-ish talk and sitting around smoking and it's all happy. well not happy, but content. yea, i'm content over here. he he. that seems silly. i should REALLY go home and go to bed.
i think aj is right that i should call in dead. fuck.