December 12th, 2003


(no subject)

i'm cold. i'm coughing. i feel like i'm going to vomit (though that might be due to light cleaning in my kitchen, don't ask, there are reasons i'm not letting people inside my apartment right now. it makes a pig-sty look like a room at the ritz. but i'm working on it.) i thought i was supposed to be better from having been sick.

i don't know if i can handle worcester tomorrow.

on a completely different note: one of my very close friends has been injured. because of where he is right now, i can't know how bad, but he's at least ok. he had his mother e-mail me, which was nice, but i feel like my concerns are more justified now than ever. it really shook me up yesterday. also considering i hadn't heard from him and can only contact him by letters.... yea. real comfort. so if i seem short or emotional or something, that's why.

back to that thing i call cleaning.

i'm thinking about taking a sledge hammer to my TV. or my brain. i think the latter is the actually defective part, but the former is slightly less destructive. that and if i take it back to best buy and claim it was my 12 year old cousin or something that did it they'll replace it under my 4 year warranty. or something.

  • Current Music
    The Gathering - Rollercoaster

(no subject)

do not pull this crypic ass bullshit with me. you bring something up, then TALK to me about it. if you don't want to talk to me about it over the phone when other people are there, then don't bring it up over the phone when other people are here.

you WANT me to push away from you? you WANT to sabatoge everything we've been working for? fine. go ahead. i'm sick of you playing these games and blaming it all on me.

i'm not even mad. i'm hurt. this is NOT my fault anymore. i've been takeing the blame for months. but that was fucking childish bullshit. fuck you. stop it. just stop it.

(no subject)

oh, and on another note, if you think i'm mistreating someone, or using someone, or taking advantage of someone, fucking talk to me about it. i don't like hearing that people think that, and aren't being told who. you all should know to come and talk to me to my face about it.