February 19th, 2008


Open Letter

Dear Future Partner(s),

My standards for communication are... high. Really high. Super duper uber high. Afraid that you might be over-sharing, and telling me things that I don't actually need to be told, because they are obvious, or are things I already know? Yea, you might be starting to communicate enough for me.

I have learned to over-share on the side of making me look neurotic vs the horrors of having not told someone something important, or having something not important turn into something disastrous 'cause it just was never ever discussed.

This is not to say I am perfect. I often fall short of my own standards. There are still things that it is hard for me to talk about, and I do screw this up sometimes. I'm not good at talking about what I want out of my own sex life, even though I am really comfortable talking about sex in general. I can talk about passion but the more I get hurt, the harder it is for me to admit to how much I care about someone, or I become embarrassed by it, because caring = weakness in some twisted part of my brain.

But I am trying, and I ask that you try too. One day, when we find each other, hopefully we will be better at it together than we are alone.

Anything worth having is worth working for.
Anyone worth having is worth dying for.
I am way more vulnerable than I pretend I am, and I am so sick of pretending all the time.