Nchanter (nchanter) wrote,

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More signs that Nchanter is growing up.


Twice this weekend I've gotten dressed to leave the house, and both times I've put on my favorite pair of gothy pants, which still fit, in a "the measurements fit the contours of my body" way, but they no longer seem to FIT. I'm not saying that bondage pants or the like are not adult, but they are not the adult that I am growing into. They are still appropriate for one of the masks I wear, but they have moved entirely into "event wear" in my head. Next time I clean my room they will move to the drawers that are specifically for event wear.

Give me a pair of jeans, black or blue, and a black top that shows a little bit, but not too much, cleavage any day. Give me my favorite pair of boots, which actually have a 2" heal. What I wear to work is also what I want to wear going out, most of the time. I am changing, and it feels like I'm changing into an adult. Hopefully these changes will soon filter into things like keeping my apartment neater, or paying my bills more on-time, but it's something, and I will take what I can get.

Honestly, it's just a visible, outward sign of the reduced amount of chaos in my brain. But it is something I can see, and I like that there are changes I can see, even if they are silly and superficial. Now I just need to stop being so shocked at the times I feel like I'm being an adult...
Tags: life, path, self

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